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Sunday, June 19, 2011

The Week in Weiner Comedy


15 Hilarious Weinergate Reactions

Last week, comedians and hosts reacted to allegations that Congressman Anthony Weiner sent lewd photos via Twitter. After his press conference Monday, Stephen Colbert, Kathy Lee Gifford, and more went in for round two. WATCH VIDEO of 15 new hilarious reactions to the Weinergate confession.

Fallon’s Press Junk-et
Jimmy Fallon put his SNL skills to use while impersonating Weiner in a faux press conference. During the sketch, the would-be Weiner apologized to "those who I care about most," but his sincerest apologies went to his huge and hard-working “staff.” Unlike the actual congressman, Fallon nailed it.
Trump to Weiner: You're Fired, Psycho
A story isn't a story until Donald Trump weighs in on it. Luckily, the Donald recently posted a video decrying Weiner's actions and calling him a "psycho." As if those words weren't harsh enough, Trump punctuated his thoughts by telling the shamed politician that he clearly "has a death wish." Guess Weiner won't be invited on to The Celebrity Apprentice any time soon.
Conan Will Hide Your Junk
Some say the problem isn't with sending photos of your nether regions, the real problem is when people can identify them. The folks over at Conan have found a way to remedy that, with this ad featuring an assortment of phallic disguises. Alas, this video came out too late in Weinergate for a certain member of Congress to hide his own member.
Jon Stewart Bleeds For Comedy
Being funny is dangerous work. While taping a Daily Show sketch Tuesday, Jon Stewart cut himself on some glass used in a Weiner spoof that involved a blender. Despite blood running down his arm, Stewart powered through, even holding a towel to his injury while he finished collecting some laughs at the congressman's expense.
Kathy Lee Has a Bone to Pick
Sometimes Weiner puns are simply unavoidable. Today show hosts Kathy Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb weren’t about to let a good innuendo pass them by. Kotb let one slip when discussing Kathy's frustrations with Weiner, when she said to throw her a “bone.” We can always count on the wine-swilling hosts for some “mind in the gutter” action.


Ripa and Weiner: Bosom Buddies?
Setting an all new low in self-deprecating humor: When Kelly Ripa dissected the chest shot of Weiner, she had no qualms about the similarities between the congressman’s ripped pecs and her own chest. The first thought that came to the physically fit Live! host’s mind? “When I first saw this photo, I was like, ‘is that me?’” she told a shocked Regis Philbin.

A Proud Day to Be a Journalist
One day in the future, your grandchildren may wonder where you were when Anthony Weiner fessed up to his crotch shot—at least that’s what Stephen Colbert thinks. The host said he relished the chaos that ensued during Monday’s emergency press conference, thanks to his career of pursuing the truth. “The truth came out… like a dolphin wiggling free of a blanket,” Colbert quipped.

Adventures in Sexting
Bringing a whole definition to “junk email”: Jay Leno demonstrated what could be the next chapter in Weiner’s sexting and social-media escapades. In his opening Tonight Show monologue, the host said he forgot to turn his cellphone off before taking the stage, just in time to receive his very own faux-message from the congressman. Leno held up a video of the would-be Weiner dancing in his underpants for the audience to see. Crotch photos are already so passé.

Ferguson Wants More Weiner
Following in Colbert’s footsteps, Craig Ferguson nearly jumped up and down for joy when he talked about Weiner’s press conference. “I couldn’t sleep last night! I said, ‘Ohh, I’m going to see that Weiner tomorrow,’” the host said. However, Ferguson did make one sad admission about the scandal. Alas, we will never have a President Weiner, “which seems a shame, really,” he added.

Unloading on Weiner’s Chest
Jon Stewart just went there. As Weinergate unfolds, comedians and pundits have upped the ante in their reactions. Naturally, Stewart—who’s arguably been having the most fun of all with the scandal—found a way to outdo himself. The Daily Show host finally revealed what lives deep inside Weiner’s cavernous pecs: James Franco. Are there any double entendres that haven’t been used yet?


Should Weiner Resign?
Elizabeth Hasselbeck had some fightin’ words for the embattled congressman. The View co-host said she thinks Weiner should resign. “I don’t care what you do on your own time. The fact that you lied to the American people for a week… You knew that was you,” she said. If the fear of getting caught isn’t enough for would-be tweeters and cheaters, behold the wrath of Hasselbeck scorned.

Comedians Roast Weiner After Resignation

 







Late night comedians have been having a Weiner roast since the sexting scandal involving New York congressman Anthony Weiner first broke.
News of his resignation Thursday brought on a fresh onslaught of jokes from all the late-night hosts -- except Jon Stewart, who was at an event in Washington, D.C. Stewart didn't tape a show yesterday because he was performing at a Bob Woodruff Foundation event where he got in a few cracks about Weiner according to someone who attended the event.
On "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno," Leno joked that "there will be no more junk mail from Anthony Weiner," adding "I guess he realized he couldn't stick it out any longer."
Leno quipped that his replacement may be Brett Favre, who was embroiled in a similar sexting scandal, and made a gag that the embattled congressman may want to text his resignation letter.
On the "Late Show with David Letterman," a package of hotdogs were tossed out to Letterman during his monologue, packaged as "Weiner's Wieners" and touted as a great gift for dad on Father's Day. Letterman then joked about Weiner sending photos to voters, with a note reading: "remember when you're in the voting booth – pull THIS lever!"
Letterman closed his barrage of Weiner jokes with a sight gag about President Obama and House Speaker John Boehner's upcoming golf plans. He joked that Weiner woulnd need to be removed from the fourth hole green -- the show then cut to an animation of Weiner writhing on the golf hole.
Late night funnyman Conan O'Brien took the occasion of Weiner's resignation to officially put a moratorium on Weiner gags -- though he couldn't quite make it to the end of his nightly monologue without sneaking another one in.
Stewart's show did not tape last night. Being a personal friend of Weiner -- Stewart is an old college buddy -- was initially awkward for the comedian.
When the scandal first broke, Stewart went easy on him. "In real life, in my memory, this guy had a lot more 'Anthony' and a lot less 'Weiner,'" he said. "The only thing they have in common is that they both lean to the extreme left."
Even when Weiner admitted at the June 6 press conference that he lied about sending Twitter pictures of his crotch and bare chest, Stewart didn't immediately pounce on him.
After joking that "he's packing jumbo heat" and remarking that "he's f***in' ripped -- I can't believe this guy and I are the same age," Stewart said, "this story officially became sad."
Since then, Stewart has taken his share of shots at the congressman. One of those shots resulted in Stewart actually cutting his hand on a margarita glass while giving a fake news conference parodying Weiner's emotional news conference admitting he lied about the sexting.
Even Stewart had to admit that the story, with its raunchy photos and a last name that is already a punchline, was just too irresistible for a comedian.
"It was by any standard a gift from the comedy -- whatever it is comedians have that takes the place of God," he joked.
As expected there have been plenty of Weiner jokes from all corners.
"If your name is Weiner and you hold public office, don't tempt fate with Internet pics. #AreyoulisteningBoehner?" "Star Trek" star George Takei wrote on Twitter.


"Congressman Weiner is in a lot of trouble since he tweeted those pictures," Conan O'Brien said on his late-night show. "But good news for him, he just found out he'll be allowed to keep his porn name ... Anthony Weiner."
Craig Ferguson, host of his own CBS late, late night show, especially had a field day.
"Congressman Weiner's Twitter account was hacked allegedly, and someone texted a picture of his 'junior senator' to a college girl. Now this is good news for me because I can Google Wiener photos at work and not get fired," he joked.
"Can you believe this? Representative Ball is criticizing Congressman Weiner. Your move, Mayor Scrotum," he joked again.
And he joked some more: "I have to ask this: 'What kind of world are we living in when porn stars make Weiners go down?' It's reverse world."
Then, there were jokes about the photos.
From Jimmy Fallon: "At a press conference this afternoon, Congressman Anthony Weiner admitted that he tweeted out that photo of his crotch. During the press conference, Congressman Weiner was choked up and got a lump in this throat -- not as big as the lump in his underwear, but still, very emotional."
"View" co-host Joy Behar on Twitter: "Hard to tell from photos if Anthony Weiner is well-endowed. They say the camera adds ten pounds."
David Letterman: "I don't know if laws were broken or not, but Weiner was sending around pictures of him in his underpants and I thought, Well, now, wait a minute, what is the big deal? Don't men and women in Congress get to mail their packages for free?"
And Jay Leno: "With all this new media, is that considered junk e-mail? Or is it e-mail of your junk? There are so many terms."
Bill Maher put the scandal in context with other sex scandals involving politicians.
"Thanks to you, Congressman Weiner, there is now a new low in what passes for a sex scandal," he said. "JFK got Marilyn Monroe. John Edwards got a love child. You got mail."

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Holding Iranian Human Rights Abusers Accountable


U.S. Department of State 
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Hillary Rodham Clinton 
Secretary of State
Washington, DC
June 9, 2011


In June 2009, the world watched as Iran’s security forces violently suppressed thousands of Iranians who were calling for transparency and accountability in their government. Nearly two years after Iran’s brave citizens took to the streets, the struggle for civil liberties and fundamental rights continues. Today, the United States has sanctioned three Iranian government entities complicit in the ongoing brutal repression – the Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps, the Basij Resistance Force, and Iran’s Law Enforcement Forces (LEF) – as well as LEF Commander Ismail Ahmadi Moghadam.
While Iran’s leaders hypocritically applaud protesters abroad calling for self-determination, many of Iran’s own citizens -- including founding members of the revolution -- are being held as political prisoners merely for holding views contrary to Iran’s leaders. Iranians are being executed for crimes based on dubious charges and without the due process guaranteed under Iran’s constitution. Religious and ethnic minorities are intimidated and imprisoned, while women’s rights activists, human rights defenders, clerics, and labor leaders are targeted for retribution for seeking human rights for themselves and other Iranian citizens. By barring many of Iran’s most accomplished artists, journalists, and academics from working, and forcing many to flee their homeland, the Iranian government restricts the space where free thought and expression can flourish.
The United States stands with all Iranians who wish for a government that respects their human rights, their dignity and their freedom, and we call on the Iranian government to end its systematic human rights abuses and political hypocrisy. Today’s sanctions reflect our commitment to hold accountable those governments and officials that violate human rights and deprive their citizens of the opportunities and future they deserve.

CORNYN, KYL FILE AN AMENDMENT TO ASSESS NATIONAL SECURITY RISKS OF AMERICA’S BALLOONING DEBT








PoliticalNews.me - Jun 11,2011 -


Measure Boosts Transparency & Reporting On Debts to Foreign Governments 




WASHINGTON — U.S. Senators John Cornyn (R-Texas) and Jon Kyl (R-Arizona) filed an amendment to the Economic Development Administration reauthorization bill, to require the President to regularly assess the economic and national security risks associated with our nation’s mounting debt. It would also ensure policymakers and the American public are more clearly informed on the details and risks of our overall debt to foreign countries. 


Senator Cornyn said, “The federal government’s reckless deficit spending has created a fiscal crisis and a growing national security vulnerability. A massive chunk of our debt is held by foreign governments such as Communist-led China, whose true motivations for doing so remain unclear. My hope is that this legislation will provide a reality check, help rein in the out of control spending, and make our nation safer.” 


Senator Kyl said, “We have now reached the $14.3 trillion debt limit, which is a crushing amount of debt. Under the budget plan the President presented earlier this year, our public debt would double before the end of his four-year term and triple ten years from the day he took office. The fact that we now borrow 40 cents of every dollar the government spends, much of it from foreign interests, threatens both America’s solvency and sovereignty. This legislation will shed light on the risks of being beholden to foreign creditors. It also requires the development of a spending reduction plan to mitigate unacceptable risk.”


U.S. government spending has exacerbated the dependence of the U.S. on foreign creditors, such as the People’s Republic of China. Today, China is the largest foreign holder of U.S. government debt. Some Chinese government officials have scolded senior U.S. Government officials over the mounting debt, and others have publicly threatened to use China’s large U.S. debt holdings to retaliate against U.S. policies they oppose. In recent response to a U.S. decision to sell defensive weapons systems to Taiwan, an official of China’s People’s Liberation Army warned that China might sanction the U.S. by “dumping” U.S. government bonds. A rapid and substantial Chinese divestment of U.S. debt holdings would have a destabilizing effect on the U.S. economy. 


The Cornyn-Kyl amendment, which was also introduced as the Foreign-Held Debt Transparency and Threat Assessment Act of 2011 in May, will require the President and the U.S. Government Accountability Office (GAO), the evaluation and auditing arm of Congress, to provide regular analysis of the national security and economic implications of the national debt. A previous version of this legislation passed the Senate last June as an amendment to an unemployment compensation bill. The legislation will:


1) improve transparency and reporting regarding overall foreign holdings of U.S. debt, equipping U.S. policymakers with a more accurate picture of which countries are financing U.S. deficit spending;


2) require the President to provide Congress with quarterly risk assessments—both classified and unclassified—on the national security and economic hazards






posed by current levels of foreign holdings of U.S. Government “debt instruments”;


3) instruct the GAO to provide Congress with an annual risk assessment on national security and economic hazards posed by the national debt, as well as recommendations for reducing federal spending;


4) and require the President, in the event that any heightened risks are found to exist, to address those risks and implement a plan of action to reduce Federal spending.

SC's Boeing case likely to be issue in presidential race


- McClatchy Newspapers
WASHINGTON -- 
What began as an administrative complaint over the opening of a factory in South Carolina has grown into an all-out political brawl on its way to becoming a major presidential election issue involving unions and the future of U.S. capitalism.
When an administrative law judge takes up the National Labor Relations Board's case against Boeing in Seattle on Tuesday, he will incite Republicans, who accuse President Barack Obama of attempting to thwart job growth to appease union cronies and advance big-government policies.
"All eyes will be on Seattle next Tuesday, when one of our nation's greatest assets and contributors to our economic future will be put on trial for investing, creating and innovating at a time when we are in the middle of an economic recession," U.S. Lamar Alexander, R-Tenn., said on the Senate floor last week.
At issue is whether Boeing engaged in union-busting with its 2009 decision to open a plant in North Charleston to make 787 jets for airlines around the world. Those airlines already have pre-purchased more than 800 of the aerospace giant's cutting-edge Dreamliners.
Experts say the case could take years to wind its way through the labor board and courts, and even then, its resolution is not likely to affect Boeing's new S.C. plant.
The National Labor Relations Board's top lawyer says Boeing built the factory in South Carolina, a right-to-work state with few labor disputes, to retaliate against its unionized employees for past strikes at the Fortune 50 firm's hub in Everett, Wash.
Lafe Solomon, the labor board's acting general counsel, said "a thorough investigation" led him to file the April 20 complaint that will get is first formal airing in the Seattle courtroom.
"During this hearing, all parties will have a chance to present their arguments and evidence," Solomon said. "It will be up to the judge to weigh that evidence and issue a decision."
Boeing, the world's largest aerospace company, appears undeterred by the proceeding. The firm held a ribbon-cutting ceremony Friday outside its new plant, next to Charleston International Airport, even though the facility won't open until next month and won't produce any Dreamliners until the fall.
Boeing officials said the ceremony's timing - just days before the Seattle hearing - was coincidental, not an in-your-face gesture aimed at Washington.
"We at the Boeing Co. are celebrating an important day in American manufacturing," said Sean McCormack, communications head of the firm's government operations. "We are confident that we will prevail against the National Labor Relations Board complaint, but today for us is not about that dispute."
Republican leaders were less measured in framing the symbolic factory opening as a political shot aimed at Obama and unions that have made millions of dollars in campaign contributions to him and other Democratic candidates.
Gov. Nikki Haley, South Carolina's first female governor, used risqué slang in hailing the ribbon-cutting and pledging her state's full support in Boeing's struggle against the labor board.
"We are going to fight for you, we're going to support you, we're going to be a cheerleader, and we can't wait to see those mack-daddy planes come out of here," Haley told Boeing officials flanking her at the factory-opening ceremony.
"South Carolina earned the right to build airplanes for Boeing in our state, and no one is going to take that away from us," said U.S. Sen. Lindsey Graham, a Seneca Republican.
Graham, a military lawyer who was in private law practice before joining Congress in 1995, derides the labor board case as a "frivolous" act of "political theater."
Virtually every major business group, from the Chamber of Commerce to the National Association of Manufacturers, is backing Boeing in the dispute.
Those Republican-leaning groups, along with their hundreds of member companies, have provided their own millions to GOP political candidates.
Obama aides have refused to comment on the case, saying the NLRB is an independent agency that must operate free of White House influence.

Michele Bachmann's coming out party



In the first real GOP debate, the Minnesota congresswoman puts on a performance tailor-made for the Tea Party

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Are the world's women disappearing?



The balance between males and females is becoming increasingly skewed. An expert explains why we should be worried